Ho Does Indy: Episode III

Act 1 - Mac lab, basement of library at Marian

[Ho looks up from doing homework during his shift and speaks to Coleman, Mac lab administrator]

Ho: Hey, are there any Meijers or Walmarts around here? I need to go blow some gas even though I don't have money to do it with.
Coleman: Sure, I can help ya. Go out to 38th street and turn left. Go until ya see the big "Meijer" sign. Can't miss it!
Ho: (makes what appears to be a blonde look (though we all know that's impossible)) OK!

Act II - In Scurf, leaving Doyle Hall Parking Lot

(pulling out of his spot)
Ho: Whoa, sh*t, that car is awfully close...whoa WHOA...God, I hope that Sebring already had that mark...
(pulls out onto road)
Ho: Hey, this is a piece of cake...*pause*...29th street? What the hey? Oh well, we'll see where this goes, I guess...(another pause)...That looks an awful lot like downtown. HEY! I'm on 27th??
Scurf: SQEEEEEEEEAAAAAAALL
Ho: Sorry there, pal.
Scurf: *backfire*

(sometime later)

Ho: That looks an awful lot like I-65...aw crap, why do they MERGE???
Scurf: *shrug*
Ho: Some help YOU are...
Scurf: *drops gas dial a little lower*
Ho: (nervous laugh) Aw, c'mon, you know I was just joshin' ya...
Scurf: *rolls headlights in disgust*
Ho: Hey, look, take this exit for 38th street...most excellent...

Act III - Meijer

Ho: (evil laughter) Two Cruisers and a yellow and I've just pulled in...I think I'm gonna like this place...
(having finished shopping and leaving lot)
Ho: So THAT'S the Hooters the guys all went to...how convenient...
Scurf: SQEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLLL
Ho: No, Scurf. I already ate.
Scurf: *leaks some antifreeze tears*
Ho: No, buddy, we're going home.
Scurf: Dammit.