A Tribute to Capitalism
or The Ballad of the Lost Art of Curding Cheese
This weekend, a sign on the side of the road on the Northside caught my attention. In big, black, bold letters were the words "Cheese Curds." It looked like one of those signs that old guys with beards and hole-riddled clothing carry around on the sidewalks downtown. Naturally this got me to wondering. All sorts of questions came to mind, like "What does one use cheese curds for?" or "Are homemade cheese curds sold along US-31 safe for human consumption?" or even "Wouldn't it be great to change the sign so that it reads "Cheese Turds"?" The possibilities were endless. But before I could finish laughing about cheese turds, I was already several miles past the sign.
I think, as a poor college student, this is a great way to make money. All I have to do is pick up out-of-date milk for cheap from a big store like Meijer and just let the crap sit somewhere until it starts looking chunky. Then I could actually sell that shit! I love capitalism. Supply and demand will make me a rich man.
I just hope the demand for cheese turds is really high.
In All Seriousness, Folks...
or This Movie Quote Is Brought To You By Sarah, The Movie Queen
Believe it or not, I think that I do a pretty good job of keeping my quoting down to a minimum on here. But this little trinity of quotes is too good - too IMPORTANT - to not get as much publication as possible. This first one, from the hilarious movie "Bruce Almighty" is a the crux of a conversation between God (Morgan Freeman, of course) and Bruce (Jim Carrey).
God: People want me to do everything for them. And what they don't realize is: they have the power. You want to see a miracle, son... be the miracle. [He begins to climb the ladder]
Bruce: Wait, are you leaving?
God: Yeah, I figure you can handle things now.
Bruce: What if I need you? What if I have questions?
God: That's your problem Bruce; that's everybody's problem. You keep looking up. [He disappears]
This second quote comes to you from the poet Walt Whitman.
"I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained,
I stand and look at them long and long.
They do not sweat and whine about their condition,
They do not like awake in the dark and weep for their sins,
They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God,
Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things,
Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago,
Not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth."
Finally, Hippocrates.
"Prayer indeed is good, but while calling on the gods a man should lend himself a hand."
"Talkin' 'bout Summertime"
Name The Band, Get Ho-Points
It's never too early to start thinking about big plans for the summer, so I didn't think it would hurt to appeal to my fellow Chancellors to consider camping once again this year for the VI Summer Get-Together. I'm not going to be having a party this year for my birthday, so if my memory serves me correctly, the only regularly scheduled party would be McRoe's in July - am I correct? I thought maybe this year we could try something earlier in the summer so that there won't be any school prep stuff to get in people's ways. I don't know who's taking summer classes and when they're taking them, though, so that's something else that we'll have to take into consideration. May can be a cool month, but it's early yet.
Do you realize that this is our second to last summer vacation ever? Well, except for me, but that's not my point. My point is, we've only got two breaks left. Remember how adamant we were about going to Colorado for our last break, Heaton? Or somewhere at least a Million Miles away? *sigh* Then we realized it wasn't in the cards. My invitation to anyone who wants to crash at my future apartment in Colorado still stands, even though I haven't seriously looked into that much. I still say we should look at something at least semi-big for the Final Summer. All it took for a great time last summer was Shades, so we know for sure that there is at least one really cool place within a sane distance.
Time to get off the Reminiscence Train and get back on track (that was a really, really poor choice of phrasing, but I like it). In summary - let's hear some ideas! Chicago's never out of the question; hell, as far as Chicago goes, the three of us guys still have a special trip to make yet. :-D Camping is great. I don't know how the rest of you feel about fishing or boating, but Tim takes our bass boat out all the time with his friends, so I'm sure we could do that if anyone feels so inclined. Or Papa just got a big boat with a canopy and all, except the motor's not currently running. Maybe a concert? I'm usually pretty good about keeping tabs on all of the bands I listen to, though, and to my knowledge, no one is planning on being in the area (for a reasonable price) in the near future.
Like I said earlier, the possibilities are endless.
or The Ballad of the Lost Art of Curding Cheese
This weekend, a sign on the side of the road on the Northside caught my attention. In big, black, bold letters were the words "Cheese Curds." It looked like one of those signs that old guys with beards and hole-riddled clothing carry around on the sidewalks downtown. Naturally this got me to wondering. All sorts of questions came to mind, like "What does one use cheese curds for?" or "Are homemade cheese curds sold along US-31 safe for human consumption?" or even "Wouldn't it be great to change the sign so that it reads "Cheese Turds"?" The possibilities were endless. But before I could finish laughing about cheese turds, I was already several miles past the sign.
I think, as a poor college student, this is a great way to make money. All I have to do is pick up out-of-date milk for cheap from a big store like Meijer and just let the crap sit somewhere until it starts looking chunky. Then I could actually sell that shit! I love capitalism. Supply and demand will make me a rich man.
I just hope the demand for cheese turds is really high.
In All Seriousness, Folks...
or This Movie Quote Is Brought To You By Sarah, The Movie Queen
Believe it or not, I think that I do a pretty good job of keeping my quoting down to a minimum on here. But this little trinity of quotes is too good - too IMPORTANT - to not get as much publication as possible. This first one, from the hilarious movie "Bruce Almighty" is a the crux of a conversation between God (Morgan Freeman, of course) and Bruce (Jim Carrey).
God: People want me to do everything for them. And what they don't realize is: they have the power. You want to see a miracle, son... be the miracle. [He begins to climb the ladder]
Bruce: Wait, are you leaving?
God: Yeah, I figure you can handle things now.
Bruce: What if I need you? What if I have questions?
God: That's your problem Bruce; that's everybody's problem. You keep looking up. [He disappears]
This second quote comes to you from the poet Walt Whitman.
"I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self-contained,
I stand and look at them long and long.
They do not sweat and whine about their condition,
They do not like awake in the dark and weep for their sins,
They do not make me sick discussing their duty to God,
Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things,
Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago,
Not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth."
Finally, Hippocrates.
"Prayer indeed is good, but while calling on the gods a man should lend himself a hand."
"Talkin' 'bout Summertime"
Name The Band, Get Ho-Points
It's never too early to start thinking about big plans for the summer, so I didn't think it would hurt to appeal to my fellow Chancellors to consider camping once again this year for the VI Summer Get-Together. I'm not going to be having a party this year for my birthday, so if my memory serves me correctly, the only regularly scheduled party would be McRoe's in July - am I correct? I thought maybe this year we could try something earlier in the summer so that there won't be any school prep stuff to get in people's ways. I don't know who's taking summer classes and when they're taking them, though, so that's something else that we'll have to take into consideration. May can be a cool month, but it's early yet.
Do you realize that this is our second to last summer vacation ever? Well, except for me, but that's not my point. My point is, we've only got two breaks left. Remember how adamant we were about going to Colorado for our last break, Heaton? Or somewhere at least a Million Miles away? *sigh* Then we realized it wasn't in the cards. My invitation to anyone who wants to crash at my future apartment in Colorado still stands, even though I haven't seriously looked into that much. I still say we should look at something at least semi-big for the Final Summer. All it took for a great time last summer was Shades, so we know for sure that there is at least one really cool place within a sane distance.
Time to get off the Reminiscence Train and get back on track (that was a really, really poor choice of phrasing, but I like it). In summary - let's hear some ideas! Chicago's never out of the question; hell, as far as Chicago goes, the three of us guys still have a special trip to make yet. :-D Camping is great. I don't know how the rest of you feel about fishing or boating, but Tim takes our bass boat out all the time with his friends, so I'm sure we could do that if anyone feels so inclined. Or Papa just got a big boat with a canopy and all, except the motor's not currently running. Maybe a concert? I'm usually pretty good about keeping tabs on all of the bands I listen to, though, and to my knowledge, no one is planning on being in the area (for a reasonable price) in the near future.
Like I said earlier, the possibilities are endless.
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