Things You Should Know Before You Get Inside Scurf
or This List Could Save Your Life
1. Don't mess with the volume. You have to wait about 15 minutes before you will be able to turn it back up to a volume that I can hear. I become rather irate without music when I'm driving, so if you value your life, don't touch the volume button.
2. The passenger side window has to be rolled up before the driver's side window, otherwise a eardrum-rupturing whistle will make the whole question of the volume of the stereo rather pointless.
3. Yes, the brake light is flashing. Don't worry about it.
4. Gently coax the seatbelt around you. A hard jerk is never a good thing. Ever.
5. If you steal the little black man on my dashboard, I will chase you. In Scurf.
6. No riding in Scurf unless you are willing and able to push him.
7. Riding in the bed of the truck is prohibited, unless you are part of a TP crew that is trying to make a desperate getaway at really-fucking-early in the morning because someone decided to parade around in front of the front entryway of the target house with a dead pike on a Halloween pitchfork.
Ride safely. Ride with someone else.
or This List Could Save Your Life
1. Don't mess with the volume. You have to wait about 15 minutes before you will be able to turn it back up to a volume that I can hear. I become rather irate without music when I'm driving, so if you value your life, don't touch the volume button.
2. The passenger side window has to be rolled up before the driver's side window, otherwise a eardrum-rupturing whistle will make the whole question of the volume of the stereo rather pointless.
3. Yes, the brake light is flashing. Don't worry about it.
4. Gently coax the seatbelt around you. A hard jerk is never a good thing. Ever.
5. If you steal the little black man on my dashboard, I will chase you. In Scurf.
6. No riding in Scurf unless you are willing and able to push him.
7. Riding in the bed of the truck is prohibited, unless you are part of a TP crew that is trying to make a desperate getaway at really-fucking-early in the morning because someone decided to parade around in front of the front entryway of the target house with a dead pike on a Halloween pitchfork.
Ride safely. Ride with someone else.
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