Live 8 Gets a Finger, Not a Fist
or I Hate Whiney, Poor People

Live 8 - that strange concoction of celebrities and musical stars who try to sound educated about something besides their own careers - pisses me off. Dave Matthews was on camera trying to convince people that rich countries have the means to eliminate AIDS (meaning medically). Ashley Judd was running around the streets of Madagascar, looking into the tents of the women who sell their bodies for money. And the idiocy just continued.

No, we do not have the means to eliminate AIDS. Although it would help both the poverty situation and the AIDS situation if the African men didn't spend every penny they earned on sex in the street.

You want me to support an effort to give horny men more sex? And then spread more AIDS that they will require even more money to wipe out? No. Not gonna happen. None of this "We don't want money, only support" bullshit either. Support means money. We're America - we're smarter than you. Do you think that you could pull that over on us?

It's not just money. Live 8 is also calling for "fair trade" and debt cancellation throughout the continent. Fair trade? Last I knew, the slave trade was gone. If all you can offer me is bananas, tough shit if I can get them cheaper elsewhere. Africa does not have the natural resources to become the next United States. The world would have already come down hard on the continent if there was anything there worth investing in. Bananas? I'll stick with the Chiquita Banana Lady.

Debt cancellation? That means we've given them money in the past to stimuate development. Obviously they've only wasted those millions (probably billions) of dollars. We have great enough debt in our own country - we can't afford to cancel out money that is owed to us.

I hope the G8 doesn't do squat.

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