Choked, Maimed, or Irradiated - It's Your Choice or The Real Life "A Christmas Story" Do you miss the days of toys that were actually intended to put your eyes out? Then you'll love this little trip down memory lane . Man, I want that Atomic Energy Kit.
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Two Spectacular Achievements in Science or Two Tickets to Mars, Please First, and probably the most exciting, is this: scientists have discovered what they believe is proof of liquid water existing on Mars right now . Technically this water is located underground and only makes it to the surface in bursts, but the fact that it is there factors massively into the "Earth --> Moon --> Mars" plan. (Incidentally, NASA unveiled a very sketchy outline of the plan to return to the Moon this week. However, I felt it didn't warrent a post since nothing new was really mentioned, outside of a stronger emphasis on building the lunar station near one of the poles; the South Pole is the current frontrunner, since there is a region there which is in sunlight almost continuously.) Water on Mars, going to the Moon inside of 20 years, it all sounds very exciting. It's also exactly what our poor, diminished space program needs - something to fire the minds of a generation th...
The Ho Media Awards Nominations or Bring It On Down The first thing you'll probably notice is that this year's awards are a little different - more general, in fact. As promised last year, the award pool has been widened to include more forms of media than just music. The best books, websites, movies, and music of the year will all be presented to you during the first week of January. But before we get there, we need to announce the nominations. Yes, "we." This year, I'm pleased to be bringing another creative force to the brain-pool that analyzes the past year's achievements: my wonderful wife. So without further ado, we give you the cream of the crop for 2006. Song of the Year Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is ~ Jet Uncle Johnny ~ The Killers Supermassive Black Hole ~ Muse Lord Don't Slow Me Down ~ Oasis Black Swan ~ Thom Yorke Album of the Year Mr. Lemons ~ Glen Phillips Shine On ~ Jet Black Holes and Revelations ~ Muse Discovery Artist of the ...
Coming Soon or Didja Miss Me? The nominations for the HMA's will be out sometime this week. Pictures from both the wedding and the honeymoon are now available on Sarah's Facebook page; I can post a Snapfish link for those who might be interested. I'm mentally preparing an article that is tentatively titled "Halftime at Grad School," which will probably be a pissed off rant. The Oasis album is finally out, the film has already gone through one round of screenings, and now it's making its way back through the US. Dates are available through the banner below. [Edit: Those dates are out-of-date. I edited the link to take you to the newest round of showings.] It's Christmas time and all hell is breaking loose. Hang in there and as always, stay young.
Sexy Oasis Goodness or How Many Copies Are You Going To Purchase? First of all, the answer to that question, referring to the upcoming "Stop the Clocks" release, should be 4 - the limited edition CD/DVD, the triple vinyl, the EP on CD, and the EP on vinyl. Secondly, I've got an mp3 sound clip from the trailer to the upcoming rockumentary "Lord, Don't Slow Me Down" in which you hear a brand new Oasis song sung by Noel. It'll be in the Annex shortly. And thirdly, for even more fantabulous content, click on the oh-so-sexy banner below. While we're waitin', stay young.
Infringement or Outraged! But Excited! Didn't the men of the NPHS Picnic Table Luncheaters' Club invent the word "fark"? I heard either Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert use it the other night and thought I was hearing things. But nope - the rerun the next day confirmed it (yes, I watched it twice and still can't remember who used it). We've started a national farking movement!
Protecting Your Rights or Getting What You Paid For Recently, Slashdot brought my attention to the release notes for Windows Media Player 11 (currently in Beta 2). I upgraded from 10 to 11 shortly after Beta 1 came out, mostly because of the sweet new look. I missed the expandable trees in the left bar (Artist, Album, etc) that we've had for as long as I can remember, but I was nearly willing to part with them just for the looks. When Beta 2 was released, I decided I'd check it out to see if my trees were back. Then I read the Slashdot article and decided to actually read all of the license and release information. Get this : Content owners use Windows Media digital rights management technology (WMDRM) to protect their intellectual property, including copyrights. This software and third party software use WMDRM to play and copy WMDRM-protected content. If the software fails to protect the content, content owners may ask Microsoft to revoke the software’s ability to use ...
Bits and Pieces or Random Things of Questionable Importance - Taller people are smarter . Duh. You didn't need to a ginormous scientific study to figure that out. In fact, I can take that story one step further: intelligence is proportional to height. - Try as I might, I couldn't find any articles or reasoning to back the recent disappearance of the peach milkshake at Steak 'n' Shake. When you finish reading this, please write to your Congressmen and demand the return of the greatest treat ever invented. In the meantime, the Peanut Butter B&P and the Cookies & Cream B&P shakes will do. - MAN LAW: College football is starting soon. Every man is allowed to pick up to two teams to follow every week. These games supercede any other possible weekend engagements. - In the comment area for the "Congratulations, Pluto" article, I added a link to a BBC story about the uproar over Pluto's demotion. We still have hope. - Less than two month...
Congratulations, Pluto or Planet Josh Is Soon To Follow It's a fight that has been brewing for decades. The issue has been closely watched by a variety of crowds , from textbook authors to the people who make those glow-in-the-dark planets that you can stick on your ceiling. Finally, the International Astronomical Union has decided to settle the issue once and for all by voting on a defintion for the word "planet." The current frontrunner is a definition that would include at least 3 new planets . One is an object currently residing in the asteroid belt - Ceres. One is a moon of Pluto - Charon. The third is technically known by its IAU catalog number - 2003 UB313. Unfortunately, the astronomer who discovered it decided to be cute and nickname it "Xena" (as in, the warrior princess). Boy am I glad we have stopped using those old Shakesperean names for planetary objects. Those made us sound way too intelligent. But Xena? Eh... We need to spice this on...
The Traffic Never Stopped or Two Salutes First, the proud salute: I don't wax patriotic. It was dull before 9/11 and now it's just irritating. However, as you faithful readers know, I believe strongly in today's holiday. I hope each of us, in our own everyday battles with the world, can and will stand up for what we believe is the right thing to do. Compromise doesn't win wars. Guts do. Second, the not-so-proud salute (and rant): I don't understand how people can fail to be moved by some things. In all the traffic that went by our seats as Sarah and I watched the fireworks, only one car slowed to watch the sight. The rest had their eyes on the road - most of them frowning or honking their horns. Where do you need to be, people? What does it take to open your eyes? Fireworks that cover many square blocks won't do it - what will? I think these are the same people that don't stay up until midnight on New Year's Eve, or take a timeout to watch the...
The Passing of a Legend or Hail to the Chevy As a few of my closest friends have noticed, I've started looking for an automobile junkyard where I can sell off our good friend Scurf. Scurf has served me, my family, and my friends very faithfully over the past 5 years/20k miles. However, the pain of 15 mpg and various bothersome fluid leaks over the past few weeks have spelled the end of our beloved truck. This Wednesday, July 6th, Scurf will become part of a massive auto parts lot on the Westside of Indianapolis, where his parts will be used to save the lives of other vehicles just like him. On Wednesday, I'll be taking a few pictures of him here at the apartment, which I will probably add to this post. In memory of the rolling thunder machine, I invite anyone who has ever ridden in Scurf to leave some of your favorite experiences in the comment box. A few of my favorites: - Racing through the red light at the 2/20 intersection...at 40 mph. - Being heard before being seen (...
Brief Musical Interlude or There Are a Couple Books on This List, Too. Deal with it. Some new releases I'm looking forward to (maybe you too!): May 14th - Glen Phillips, "Mr. Lemons" and "Unlucky 7" June 6th - Live, "Songs from Black Mountain" July 11th - Muse, "Black Holes and Revelations"; Thom Yorke "The Eraser" July 18th - Terry Goodkind, Phantom August 29th - Terry Brooks, Armageddon's Children October 17th - Susanna Clarke, The Ladies of Grace Adieu
The Best Kind of Nerd is Unnecessarily Complicated or Overkill As most of you are probably aware, Sarah and I moved into a two bedroom apartment this past weekend. With all of this extra room, my thoughts naturally went to planning a massive network for Sarah's desktop, my three desktops, and my laptop. [1] I wanted to network as many of the computers above as I could with a minimal budget. So wifi was out; a router and five wireless cards were roughly "way the hell" out of budget. In addition to the computers above, I also had a 5-port ethernet switch on my hands. After scribbling on a few post-it notes, I finally arrived at the following setup [2]: ____| Laptop (XP/FC5) | ...
Even More Proof Than I'm An Ass or Surprised? You Shouldn't Be It amuses me to see how people get to this site. The most amusing readers are usually the ones that come here because a search engine decided I would fit the criteria for which these readers were searching.* Try this one: http://www.ask.com/web?q=Why%20I%20Hate%20whiney%20people&qsrc=1&o=10513 I came up fourth on that search at ask.com. Too funny. In other news, my undergraduate classes ended today. My first wife moved away forever, but not before giving me last year's birthday present. I was extremely saddened by a scary movie. I calmed the wind in my graduation/Jesus robe (see Mt 8: 23-27 for more details). I made koolaid with sugar that I bought in August 2002. I had my picture taken with 5 of the most important people that have been a part of my education here. It was a long day. Somebody told me today that she was sure that I was ready to leave. However, Brilliant Reader, I'm sure you...
Your Quote of the Month or Nothing Clever To Put in This Line, Sorry One of the best paragraphs thus far in Mark Helprin's "Winter's Tale": The oddest thing about the elite - of which, I suppose, I am now one - is that they rule so...daintily. The great mass of people, in which one finds brave soldiers, firebrands, geniuses, and inspired mechanics, is paralyzed in the face of these human delicacies with their garden parties, their unprotected estates, their inebriated stumbles, their pastel clothing, and their disempowering obsession with disempowering things. When a workingman moves among them, he is most amazed: amazed at how small they make him feel, amazed at their frailty, amazed that they are yet invincible, amazed that he, a bull, is ruled by a butterfly.
Food for the Hungry or It's a Metaphor; You Know I Really Don't Like Poor People Realizing it's damn near April Fool's and that I haven't cranked some thoughts out to you in a while, Kind Reader, I was inspired to take pity on you. You can thank me later. Oasis : I can't even describe the experience. Two and a half hours after the amazing concert ended, Sarah and I got out tickets signed by Liam, Gem, and Noel. Noel wasn't talking much. Liam stopped to say a few words to a few of us. Gem told me he saw me from the other side of the stage; apparently my fanatical arm-waving garnered some attention. Greatest night of my life, all made possible by the greatest person in my life. And what incredible pictures . AI : Vote for Katharine McPhee, damn it. I can't take another week like that. The Future : West Lafayette emailed me today to tell me that Purdue-WL has already accepted its allotment of grad students. So IUPUI it is. This weekend, I'l...
A Couple of Good Reasons to Put Some Money in the Bank (Updated) or If You Just Won the Lottery, Set Aside Money for These Books Following up on the post about soon-to-be-release albums, here's a look at a couple of books that I'm looking forward to seeing on shelves in the near future (maybe). Most (if not all) of these books have had more than one release date already, so these current dates aren't set in stone. Hell, by the time they come out, you will probably have earned a lot of money in interest. Terry Goodkind has promised that he will end the Sword of Truth series in two more novels (after Chainfire ). The penultimate volume, Phantom , should continue the trend away from the droning philosophical tone of The Pillars of Creation and Naked Empire . Goodkind's official site, which is currently being renovated, has an estimated June release date. Amazon says July 18th. As of today, one of the men closest to Goodkind who posts regularly to the official messag...
For My Brother Nerds or Wow, It's Your Lucky Month - 4 Posts! My chemistry professor brought this to my attention. Unfortunately, I can't find a version that's any easier to read. If YOU happen to come across a cleaner copy, please let me know. 90% of the viewing audience won't get it, but I know I have some scientifically inclined readers who will appreciate it as much as I do. Stay young.
More Musical Goodness [Edited 3/14/06 - Pi Day!] or If You Don't Care, Just Know That You Should Although nothing could beat the incredible streak of musical genuis that appeared in stores from March to June of 2005, this year is off to a promising start. Train has just released their fourth studio album, For You, It's Me . The last album, My Private Nation was met with mixed reviews by most people. It was definitely a step away from Drops of Jupiter . I haven't heard it yet; I'll probably get it for my birthday, although I'll certainly have to find the torrent before then. Blah blah illegal blah blah bite me. Goo Goo Dolls are finishing up their follow-up to the incredible Gutterflower release. April 18th is the current release date for Let Love In . A track-listing should be available on their website very shortly. Glen Phillips is releasing two - that's right, two - new albums in the next two months (roughly). His third solo album, Mr. Lemons , wi...
What Do They Know? or Listen To Me The Grammys are crap. Repeat after me: "The Grammys are crap." U2? Please. I'm with Jennie on this one - hearing Vertigo one more time will make my ears vomit blood (and let me tell you, that's quite a trick). Stick with the HMA's, gentle reader, and I promise you that you will never, ever see Kanye West's name on this page again. And another thing. Maroon 5? Write some new stuff, kids. You wore out Jane's welcome about two years ago. I hate pop culture. In happier news, six weeks from today I will be crying tears of joy. Oh the joy. Stay young.
A Break From the Norm or I Promise Never to Subject You To This Again Right, so I really despise these quiz things. Honestly, I don't care what color M&M describes my sex life or what Disney character I am most like. But as I was browsing some of my Oasis forums earlier today, I couldn't help but check this one out. I swear I didn't tamper with the questions to get the right answer, either. What Creation Records band are you? You Are... Oasis. What you lack in originality you make up for in sheer determination. You have found a nice balance between party time and work time. You have the ability to convince the world of anything you want them to believe and you shamelessly do so. You are a purist who has the tendency to live in the past, which is your biggest downfall. If you could only learn to get with the times there's no telling how big you could be. You are destined to go down in history. I wonder if the writer of that little blurb realizes how many Oasis tit...
The 2005 Ho's Choice Music Awards This has been an amazing year for my favorite artists. Several of the albums released in the first half of the year were hailed as each artist's "return to glory," marking the end of the experimental stages that most grunge-era bands went through in an attempt to topple rap/R&B and make rock popular again. Let me make this very clear - every one of the artists, albums, and songs listed here are amazing! Trying to pick a clear winner in the bunch was not an easy task. Discovery Artist of the Year - Elbow Even though they are much closer in sound to Doves, I first learned about Elbow from an Oasis forum several months back. The band is cool enough to host clips of a lot of their songs on their website, so once I'd been intrigued enough by the clips, I went to a used music store and picked up their first two albums - brilliant. They just released their third album this past fall, which I've only heard portions of onlin...