Ya know, it must suck to be deaf. Why? I can think of at least one good reason. What if you need to fart? Maybe you think you're letting it out nice and easy but in reality it's a long, high pitched screamer. You sit there assuming that no one will notice or pass it off on someone else (pun acknowledged), when in reality everyone in the room has just gone absolutely bug eyed in abject fear of the cloud that surely must be making it's way around the room, sufficating victims left and right. Or let's say you just decide to say "Excuse me" every time you fart. Well, then you're going to let people on to a LOT of farts that you could have gotten away with.

It does have a couple upsides. You can't really get yelled at, you can NEVER have the music too loud (Music? What music?), and you can't hear all of the nasty things people say about you. You can bet they'll be saying those things anyways, though, especially when you interrupt someone who's already talking, when you mess with other people's volume control as a joke, and as you're leaving trails of people clutching their faces and throats as you walk out of Hacienda.